If you’re new to the world of online role playing and fictional writing, or end up dating someone already enmeshed in it, this sort of question is bound to crop up every now and again. Whether it’s because of something you are doing or because of something she is, the answer, as with most things, depends mainly on the context of the question. When it comes to role playing in particular, it won’t always be as straight forward as being caught on the best cheater website around. Often, it is best to frame the question as she would pose it to you with her concerns and perspective weighed in just so you know how to best approach it when she inevitably asks. If you don’t take into account how things may look to an outsider, you are bound to fail in any attempt to explain or properly evaluate your behavior.
Does She Understand What Role Playing Is?
This is the easiest place to start any question of infidelity through role playing. As a general rule, people who don’t participate in role playing games, scenarios and writing have a harder time understanding the parameters of the relationship you have with your fellow role players. You can expect double the emphasis on miscommunication and possible assumptions if you ever get involved in erotic scenarios with your characters. This is true regardless of how long you have been doing this and how invested you were in whatever scenario or partner you’ve been working with prior to hooking up with her. In the end, it depends more strongly on her understanding of what’s going on and how it does or does not affect your relationship with her than how things have always been for you. Keeping this in mind it the easiest way to remember that, at first glance, catching sight of erotic or otherwise very intimate role play logs may be no different to her than see you browsing NoStringsAttached.com. You can check NoStringsAttached.com rating at cheatingsitereviews.ca and find out whether it is a legit site or not.
The best thing to do if role playing is something you have been doing for a while prior to meeting her is to be up front with it in the first place. While you may not consider it as important as, say, warning about crazy ex-girlfriends or overly invested family members, that is because you are used to it. If she isn’t, probably her only experience with the term has something to do with sex or group therapy. Neither of which is exactly the image you want to portray when it comes to keeping things straight between you, her, and your hobbies. This is particularly true in the case of erotic role playing scenarios that you write out with an online partner. In most cases this isn’t going to be much different than doing a search for the best cheater website in front of her and then wondering why she’s getting mad with you. A lot of women who aren’t familiar with the world of online role play either in video games or text simply see something like that and take it to mean there’s something wrong with your sex life or you’re just straight up cheating on her.
It’s best to cut this off at the pass by bringing up your hobby fairly early on in your relationship. You don’t need to be blunt about the frequency of the erotic scenes from the get go, but introducing the concept of role playing as something more involve than just choosing a class in an MMO or playing out a sexual fantasy in person is a good start. Show her where you usually write, whether it’s in a game, on a blog, or over email, and introduce her to some of the less risqu aspects of the story telling. Show her background you wrote up for your character, descriptions, fanart. Tell her a little about the storyline you’re involved in at the time and how interesting or flat it is to you and gauge her reaction. If you’re lucky, she might even get interested in it. If not, hey, you told her about it and maybe even introduced her to your role play partner or group, so it’s not like she can say you were hiding anything down the line.
Can You Separate In Character from Out of Character? Are You?
One of the places things start to get hazy is the in character versus out of character interaction between you and the people you are role playing with. Always be sure that you keep the two completely separate as much as possible, because this is where people end up in the most trouble. Flirting with and role play partner is different than having your character flirt with their character. If your partner is showing interest in you specifically, or any signs that she can’t differentiate between the two, it may be worth backing off for a while or attempting to talk with her about it. If you are involved, returning a flirt player to player might as well be the same as being caught looking up the best cheater website. Even if she is not familiar with role playing in general, the interaction is going to raise red flags.
On top of that, it can be incredibly easy to get carried away in a role play yourself. Don’t assume that just because you can typically tell the difference between in character and out of character chatter that your thoughts and feelings are following suit. It is actually fairly common to get really attached to partners you’ve been working with either for quite some time or simply involving characters or a plot line you are fairly invested in anyway. If your girlfriend or wife is showing concern towards the situation, don’t write her off, even if you are pretty sure the worry is just a misunderstanding. Always try to walk through the confusion worry she is showing to find out which part in particular is really bothering her and then address it specifically to allay her fears.
Are You Spending More Time with Your RP Partner Than with Her?
This can be a sign that you may be more invested in your relationship with your role play partner than your romantic one. Unlike the straight forward method of searching a site like NoStringsAttached.com for a fling to have on the side, you may have been having a fling for a while already and simply be unaware of it. In fact, most people are going to have difficulty detaching themselves from a close friend, but especially role playing partners for the sake of a new romantic relationship. In this case it comes off the same as spending time with your best friend who also happens to be a girl and not realizing that it’s more than the time you spend with your actual girlfriend just because you’re so used to doing it. The point is to look at it from the perspective of someone new to you. Anyone who sees a man and a woman hanging out all the time together, no matter the context, is probably going to assume some sort of romantic relationship, so be prepared to objectively determine if that is the case here or not.